Announcing The Doculieser (™)

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Responding to the growing need for uncertainty in a polarized political environment, The Minority Report is proud to present the most ambitious tool to hit journalism since the advent of the printing press. Commissioned by TMR and produced by RonBho LLC, a joint venture created by Ron Paul and Barack Obama operatives, drawing on their unparalleled expertise in the realm of direct marketing, the Doculieser (™)  is the wonder device that will change the rules of the game – forever!

This is not your father’s fact slicer. Simply transfer any type of record – be it text, picture or moving image- and the Doculieser does the rest. It analyzes and dissects the input with the infinite speed of RonBho’s bank of cloud computers. You will get an array of arguments that call into question the authenticity of any object – whether official record, photo, press release, interview, or video event. The state-of-the-art RonBho Conspiracy Generator(™)  software will construct a matrix of parties behind the hoax, explaining their ideological motivations and financial interests.

“We are incredibly proud of this achievement” noted Steve Foley, founder of TMR, at a recent demonstration of The Doculieser in Florida, which proved that Al Gore carried the state in 2000 – by a landslide. “For too long history has been captive to facts and the constraints of evidence. Think of how much better things would be if everyone could easily automate the creation of their own reality. The Doculieser will free millions from endless toil!”

Test results have been impressive when applied to historical records. The Doculieser has proven than NONE of Henry VIII’s marriages were valid. When turned loose on more recent events, such as the Barack Obama birth certificate controversy, the Doculieser has discovered that the president is really the descendant of Marilyn Monroe and Sammy Davis, Jr, with his Hawaiian birth orchestrated by the CIA at the direction of President John F. Kennedy (a fellow Rat Pack member).

So don’t miss out on this exciting opportunity! For a demonstration and pricing information, call 1-800-ITSALIE today!